On the wandering mind and happiness

This article, I identify a lot with. Yesterday I was with a group of friends I knew back in school, and they were sharing a lot of memories of which I only remember 20% of. I felt bad. At first I used to think it is because I have a bad memory, but truth is it was simply because I did not concentrate on the moment and my mind used to wander a lot dreaming of happier moments. And that is what I did most of my life. But not recently, since I learned that lesson, and the cure for my lousy memory was simply to live in the moment and focus more. Now of course, my mind still wanders, but we're learning, grasshoppers :)

This article is a very cool and interesting read on how letting our mind wander is a major cause of unhappiness. Simply, try to live and appreciate the moment. As my friend and school colleague told me yesterday: "Every moment that is gone, will never be replaced"

Since it's the last day of the year, I just want to wish my readers (if you're still reading that is, since I've been really ignoring this blog) a good year, I know it won't be all good, let's be realistic here, but I hope you change your job if you're unhappy now, I hope you find love, if you're feeling lonely, I hope you get a promotion if you're doing well at your job now, I hope you spend quality time with your loved ones and I hope you stay true to yourself, no matter what!

Happy 2011. Thank you for being there for me.

p.s. Happiness, is only a state of mind.

Oh well

I must admit, dates mean a lot to me, because numbers mean a lot to me, and yesterday 21/12 I got to the big 3 O.. I got a very delicious cake at work and I made a wish, a selfish wish for the first time ever, but today I would like to officially retract that wish.

Been a long time that blog is pretty dead, that's not good, since most probably I will want to get back years later to remember how I felt in this period, then again, maybe I don't want that. Subconscious can do wonders I tell ya.

Finally, being young is different from being immature. Just saying :)

Happy Birthday to me, I got myself an RC Helicopter!

I will never forget this

A teacher in school once told me: "Iza hadafik tari2o so3be, ma titkhalleh 3anno w trou7e 3al tari2 el hayne".

Like being in another world

Listen to it and thank me later. It's a Croatian song, sang by Pink Martini and called "U Plavu Zoru" (the blue dawn)

Not me - succumbing to life

I was one of those kids who aspired to become a pilot, a rock-star, a nobel prize winner, an actress who has won at least 2 grammies, the country's president, formula one driver, company owner, coffee shop owner, pub owner, some large weird space with coffe and drinks and food and pool table and darts and library and media room and all that on one place, owner... etc..

All those profiles have one or two things in common and those are, being important and having power over something or having the ability to have a strong impact or influence on people's lives. Now that is most probably because of  the superiority complexe that I suffered from, but I think most kids wanted that no?

Nowadays, I am just an employee, who works 9 to 10 hours per day, with a salary at the end of every month, no aspiration or ambition at all. And weirdly enough, I don't mind. Difference is, I still wanna be a coffee shop owner, with a pool and a library and all that... But I can do that in my future own place, my house is going to be a recreational center! Then again, this is a whole different story. For me, a job now means means to survive. And the one quote I resisted all my life, haunts me now:

"If you don't do what you love, love what you do!"

I live for nights and weekends and vacations and I dont mind doing this at all. I never thought I would reach this point in my life since, and I quote myself:

"I don't like how things go. I don't think I'm going to grow to be a traditional employee, wake at 8 am, go to work at 9 am, go to lunch for an hour at 1 pm then come back at 5 or 6 pm, be so tired to barely eat, stop doing sports and go out only on weekends when it's a lot more crowded.

No that's not me. I'm not going to fall for life classical boring life. Not me."

hmm, what planet was I living on right? A friend of mine told me, he no longer gives a high importance to building a career, as much as he cares for being remembered as a good husband, a good father and a good friend. I honestly agreed with him. I am not advocating for killing our dreams and terminating any atom of ambition, ambition is still there, it only changes from one individual to the next, and to each their own aspirations and dreams and what makes them happy.

Not all of us are going to be "Entrepreneurs", or company owners, or pilots, or rock-stars, or a hot short sports person... And it's O-Kay!

Painting by Salvador Dali - Galatea of the spheres

Chile miners to surface starting today

For some reason, this story touched my heart and I have been keeping up with its news. These guys in Chile (33 of them) were trapped for over  2 months (since August 5 due to a tunnel collapse), and the rescue was even foreseen to take place even later than now, but luckily search teams sped up with their rescue plan and it’s now ready.

 

Can you imagine being trapped more than 700 meters underground and there is no way out? Their psychological status is very delicate at this point, moreover they will be exposed to light after being in the dark for more than 2 months, they will be given some of sort of protection for their eyes, they will also wear a "bio-harness" designed for astronauts to monitor their hearts etc.. Once they’re out, they will be checked by doctors and they reunited with their families (noting that their families have been camping there since the incident, what an anticipation yeah?)

 

I was wondering how the selection will happen, will they start with the strong ones? Or the weak ones to get it over with? Apparently, they will start with the most psychologically stable ones in case something goes wrong, and then to the weakest and ill ones.

 

A capsule has been built, it will travel up and down (15 minutes to surface), and it is built in a way to resist any crumbling rocks over it.

 

Check the latest article here for more on this story.

Kylie - Part X

"May I interrupt your playing on your cellphone while being at the most prestigious and important race in the country?" He asked.

"If it was so prestigious and important in your opinion, then what the hell are you doing here talking to me?" She rudely answered.

He smiled. He was now even more interested. He slightly leaned his head to the left and bowed, he excused himself and retreated.

She was in shock, feeling an ultimate urge to go to him, grab his arm and turn him to face her so she can say more things, but she didn't know exactly whether she wanted to vent, to blame him for her being in the stupid race, or to tell him: "Interrupt! Please."

She did, she walked in a fast pace towards him and said:

"I apologize, I really do, that was very immature of me, thing is my friends dragged me here, and I'm sorry... it's not your fault, and I vented.. and"

He cut her saying "Stop apologizing, I only wanted to say one thing." And he fell silent.

*She looked at him.. waiting for him to continue.. he said nothing, and she got it, this is not a guy who is annoying and clingy and superficial, that was a smart deep guy right there, he was honest obviously, but he wasn't easy to manipulate like she's used to! And guys who can get manipulated, aren't a challenge for her. So for her, he was a challenge.*

"And that is?" she impatiently replied.

"Do you like sushi?" he asked.

She opened her eyes even more, knowing she already has big eyes, she looked pretty surprised. "Excuse me?"

"Sushi... Japanese food.. fish.. you like?" He continued.

She smiled: "Yes I do, where are you taking me?"

*Pause: See what she did? She automatically presumed he was asking her out. It's not wrong to presume things, it's a faux-pas to imagine that saying it out loud will put her in that situation where she's the smart lady who anticipates thing. She didn't think twice whether that poker move was in her benefit or not. She just threw herself, she likes adrenalin rushes, and she never learns.*

He laughed: "Hmmm, now what makes you think I am asking you out?"

This is when she flipped, she noticed her wrong move and didn't know how to get out of it. She had to think fast, she kept looking around wishing a car would drift and make a loud noise, grabbing everyone's attention. He lifted his hand and placed it gently on his forehead swiping that bit of sweat that summer day was causing, and suddenly, she saw it.

Her IQ doubled, it was more than 300 now, she thought in lightning, she said eloquently yet with so much spite: "Well, it was a joke honestly, you know, a "sitcom" material scene, you know? Asking a married man who just came out of no where and spoke to me whether he's taking me out for sushi or not?"

*Now, that was an intelligent answer, she knew he wanted to take her out, she saw the way he was looking at her, and she saw he was interested and the lame excuse he used. But, she's a strong and intelligent woman and she wasn't going to fall for a married man.*

He smiled and said with confidence: "There is this excellent sushi place I know in downtown, tomorrow night?"

Her response was completely a puzzled one, she looked up and down, left and right, looking at trees and rocks beside the road, maybe they'll give her an answer. "What just happened?" she thought to herself. She lost at this game, the ball was no longer in her field.

She looked at him, not knowing what her answer is going to be, but for some reason she couldn't control herself and she just wanted to get over with this situation and said: "Tomorrow night? hmmm I don't..."*

I should go to lunch now. Stay tuned. Check out Part 9 and before

Kylie - Part IX

*But she didn't follow. She was crying... Because she knew he didn't want her to follow him, she knew he wanted it to end before it got ugly, before they grew apart and grew as strangers. He wanted to keep that beautiful image of her, he wanted her memory to remain untouched, sacred and full of hope.


Months were gone by, Kylie found herself as a strong and independent woman. People around her were enjoying her company like she was some kind of celebrity, she projected positivity and wittiness. Yet, she was alone. For her, it was acceptable, she had come to terms with it. She felt like there was no need to be with someone in order to be happy, she understood, sharing a life with someone is her ultimate dream, but this wouldn't mean that she wasn't happy, it only means it was not complete.


She had to take a shortcut, there was too much traffic, and while at it, she passed by her ex's house. She didn't slow down, but she did take a long, a real long look. It is nice to know what that person is up to, and she thought to herself:


"Did he ever really love me? did I really matter to him? Or was it a mind trick?"


She had met her ex during a rally race. She didn't want to go, but her best friend dragged her, because her boyfriend had dragged her. So she went with them, but she had taken her phone with her on which she spent all her time playing. Cars were the least interesting thing for whole in this world.


He spotted her, she was totally his type, well, Kylie is everyone's type. She's small, beautiful, and has a posture models would die for, eyes that radiate intelligence, but face that manifests warmness. She saw him, but didn't care less. She thought: "Cute, but if he's here since 6 am to watch cars race, then well... definitely not my type!"


It was like he read her thoughts, she saw shadow near her and was immediately startled when he took her by surprise, held her arm firmly yet gently and said to her: "May I...*


It's getting a bit late and I should sleep, but should you decide to read Kylie's story (which I started in September 2008, and it had few loyal readers :), there are 8 previous parts already: I, II, III, IV, V, VI, VII, VIII

Breast Cancer might be around the corner, get yourself checked

Trying not to repeat myself from previous years and during every October, knowing that October is the Breast Cancer Awareness month, therefore I will try to say something new here.

Usually women aged 40 and older are more prune to having breast cancer than younger women. So those women, I urge you to get a mammography every 6 months, if not, at least once a year. Moreover, if you have cancer history in your family, even if you're young do get a mammography, my best friend was only 16 when she got diagnosed with breast cancer. Unfortunately, she did not make it.

I have to admit though, she was a true fighter, I don't know how that happens, how women diagnosed with breast cancer, how a teenager for that matter, confront such an ordeal in such a strong manner.

I know mammography is not a walk in the park, but it doesn't really hurt that much, and you should be better safe than sorry.

Also note that, there are ways a woman can check for lump in the breast, and that can be done every month. There are many videos online, just google: "How to check yourself for breast cancer"

People I respect

I respect a person who takes risks and follows their dreams, especially after failing prior. I respect people who put themselves out there. I respect people who pick themselves up after failing. I respect people who still work hard even at an old age and try to make a change. I respect people who still come up with new ideas and try to make them happen.

 

This post is dedicated my brother and my father. I believe in you both. And to several friends, you know yourselves, I respect you for not giving up. You inspire me.

 

Respect!

 

 

Migraines and me

Migraine cause ‘identified’ as genetic defect http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-11408113

 

Thank god I don’t have these severe migraines anymore. I used to have a migraine once a month at least, and strong ones, luckily I am one of those people who don’t mind throwing up (sorry for the disgusting visual here), even though I cry every time I do because it’s one of the worst feelings someone can go through, because throwing up due to migraine is… different. Anyway, so when I throw up a couple of times, somehow I cleanse my body and I become able to sleep still. Yes, all migraine people know it, soft pillow, no light, no sound, and no moving even for one millimeter.

 

But why am I not having migraines anymore? Because I am undergoing a laser treatment, as I suffer from TMJ – Temporomandibular joint disorder. And guess what, about 60% of people suffer from it, there are different levels of course. I started the treatment last December (2009), I go twice a week to the doctor’s. And since then, all my neck and arms pain are gone, I still have headaches, migraines come in a much lower strength, meaning I can still make it through the night, out with friends or talking to people instead of falling on the ground and lying there. YES, many times I used to stop walking and just lay on the ground.

 

Oh, what does migraine have to do with TMJ? Technically, there is no such thing as migraine per se, it’s either TMJ or epilepsy. So, if you suffer from migraine, I suggest you get your jaw checked, and not by a dentist, my Dr. is actually someone who studied general medicine, specialized in dentistry and stomatology and jaw treatment by laser (about 14 years of studying). His specialty is very rare, comes from German research and doesn’t exist much in the world. I am a firm believer that this is something people need to be aware of. If you want to know more, really don’t hesitate to contact me.

 

Armenia Day 7 and last one. A trip to remember

I loved that there were flowers everywhere in Armenia - This is in Garni, the last pagan temple to stand in Armenia

This was also taken in Garni. On that note, trees of pomegranate are also called Trees of Life :)

Red Leaves... *sigh*

I know this post is too flowery, but I had to mention how much I love daisies

Garni - looking at the valley, there is a river called Avazan

The rocks are something aren't they - Garni

Garni, the last pagan temple to remain in Armenia after all were destroyed once Christianity was accepted as a state religion in the year 301

Oh Yeah

This is Geghard church, a church part carved in the rock part built, Truly a wonder. I loved this church. 

Geghard church, notice how all churches have 4 columns and a window on top. Tradition. We were lucky that our Tourist guide chanted in this church manifesting how it echoes. A really touching moment.

"Wish upon" tree. You basically hang anything from your clothing or belongings near a holy place, in this case Geghard. Oh one person even put an "always" nylon paper :P I put a wet wipe :$

This is taken with my phone btw, my camera's battery died on me. Beautiful sight indeed, this is Avazan river near Geghard

Geghard church, part carved part built by 2 dynasties

Bread with some sugar inside, really delicious.

And this was my last stop, the cascade, but I did not go up those stairs, I truly was tired hehe

Last 5 photos were taken with my phone so :/ bare with me. Anywho, I want to thank you guys for following up on those last 7 days, it's the 2nd time I travel blog, and first time I do it in that way. I really enjoyed it, every time I shot a photo I was thinking of you and you and you... I know am a very amateur photographer, but I do hope I was able to translate the beauty I saw in Armenia (Yerevan, Sevan, Garni, Ejmiyatzin, Geghard, Ararat Valley, etc...)

And for those who are expecting a souvenir from me, they're with me, some of you I will see on Tuesday, stalk you then ;)

Armenia Day 6 - Get started, joy, happiness

Started my day by going to the Armenian history museum, unfortunately I forgot the memory card at home, so I was carrying my camera for nothing. We got ourselves a guide, which I definitely advise you to do if you visit the museum. In a nutshell, Armenia is very rich in history.

Then we moved to a restaurant called "Charentsi 28", which is actually its address. Having a very "house-like" look, this restaurant situated in Yerevan, actually offers a mixed cuisine. Meanwhile let me drop a note, Armenian cuisine in Lebanon is much richer and more delicious than the Armenian cuisine in Armenia. On the other hand, Charentsi 28, run by a Lebanese and Syrian peeps, had some very delicious dishes.

Outside of Charentsi 28

Isn't that so house like? also loved the daisies on all the tables

Izmir Kebab, very yummy, has all the sujuk spices. I also recommend the Mussaka

To wash out all this food we ate, we headed to Ararat, the cognac factory, for some cognac tasting. As soon as you get into the factory, you get high on the smell itself. I must say, I loved it, cognac is my new favorite drink.

Much much cognac

And the autumn leaves have started to fall

Fancy a bottle?

First drink is to get you in the mood, second for joy, third for happiness, and forth for craziness, and that is why you should stop after the third

That was Ararat Cognac 10 years old. The older the darker

Finally, I fulfilled my fantasy which I have been craving for since I arrived to Armenia, and that is to walk alone in its streets and have a coffee in one of its café trottoire while reading a book. So I did some shooting on my way.

Square town

Another church which I coincidently saw. Looks abandoned. It was full moon

See the reflection in Armenian alphabet?

I just love these kind of balconies, like old Tripoli back in Lebanon, or in Gemmayze

This lakes turns into ice in winter, and people would ice-skate 

Shaurma (shawarma I guess?)

It's nice to have public gardens and benches for people to rest on (latcheh lal dawle el lebneniye  hayde)

While reading "The monk who sold his Ferrari", just perfect for my trip

Armenia Day 5 - Genocide

Today's photos are mostly concentrating on the Armenian Genocide. I will not lecture you in history here, just google for more info. All I am doing is reporting what I saw today. I have to admit, it was the closest time I felt close to my origins.

I also have to confess, that as horrible as the genocide was, in some weird twisted yin yan way the world works, it made the world what it is today, Armenians are everywhere in the world because of it, I, and many others, are here because of it...

Those people died in the most horrific manner, Turkey, f*ckin RECOGNIZE ba2a the Armenian genocide that killed 1.5 million Armenian !

A bench, passed by or sat on by hundreds of thousands probably, how much more powerful can a bench get

Plaquette near the planted tree by the Lebanese President in recognition of the Armenian Genocide

Rape, violence, starvation... Armenian Genocide. 

The 18th of October 1915 issue of Russian paper "Iskry" with the article entitled "Extermination of Armenians in Turkey"

Photograph of an Armenian woman starved to death with her 2 children, in Syria - Armenian Genocide Museum

Call for help for the Armenians during the Armenian Genocide

"Bird's Nest" Orphanage of Armenian kids in Jbeil - Lebanon

City after city and country after country recognizing the Armenian Genocide

The memorial building of the martyrs of the Armenian Genocide

The flame still burns for the martyrs of the Armenian Genocide

Where my grandfather came from "Dyarbekir"

I was hoping for more autumni like trees for my photos, but I only got this one

Hribsime Church

One of my dreams came true, taking a close-up of a butterfly :) Am I lucky or what

Hribsime Church

The inside of the patriarchal church in Armenia. The oldest church (4th century) in Armenia, knowing that Armenia was the first country to adopt christianity as their state religion

More stone carving

Be water

The oldest church (4th century) in Armenia, knowing that Armenia was the first country to adopt christianity as their state religion

Zvartnots church, which was one the highest churches to ever be built, after standing for 320 years, it collapsed, either due to an earthquake or as a result for Arab raids

Casinos on the way back from the Airport towards the center of Yerevan. Also notice the fence, this is to separate the mini-highway from all the shops on the sides to avoid traffic from parked cars or cars wanting to stop at these places. Smart eh? 3a2beil Lebnen (specifically Zouk - Adma highway)

The road was full of such stores, it just reminded me of Ouze3eh :P